Is it, like, a couples holiday today or something? OK, fine, those of us without a Valentine this year are well aware that love is all up in the air. (And on the off chance we forget for a sec, we have plenty of Fifty Shades Darker promos to jog our memories real quick.)
If you're all by yourse-e-elf relationship-wise on February 14th, remember that there are tons of single ladies out there enjoying a solo wine and cheese night right along with you—and odds are, you're probably all thinking these things: "I am the Queen of Baked Goods"
Who even has time for a date when you consider that there are a kajillion DIY heart cakes, red velvet brownies, and strawberry-chocolate combos on Pinterest that NEED to happen. You get a pin! You get a pin! You get a pin! "You know what sounds amazing?"
A Dateline marathon! Nothing says livin' la vida single like murder and Lester Holt. More of this please. Oh, and pass the brownies. "Where my vibrator at?"
Whether it's post-Galentine's party or just a celebration of solo love, it's time to get reacquainted with your electronic friend. The best part? You don't have to worry about whether it will be good or not. That lil' guy always comes through.
You get that February is romantic as hell, but as you decorate your Disney Valentine's to all your Galentines, you can't help but feel warm and fuzzies for your girlfrandz.
Not to be a hater on National Love Day, but even the Valencia filter can't erase his late-night video game habit or her constant need to play grammar police (you mean "there," not "their," honey bunches of oats).
Honestly, all these Snapchat stories of lobster and cheesy pasta are becoming too much to take. You don't need a freaking boyfriend to down a bomb-ass meal, but you do need stretchy pants, which you have. Let's roll.
The best part of making your own V-Day plans is making your own V-Day plans. Drinking an impressive amount of wine in sweats? Sure! Shopping for fancy AF candles? Why not! Dancing to "Single Ladies" with your girlfriends in da club or in front of da couch? Absolutely. You do you!
A cute, sweet single dad who's still in love with his dead wife, but opens his wounded heart to one kind, funny, special lady at the top of the Empire State Building on Valentine's Day? Come on, people! Let's get real.
Rise, shine, and get to the drugstore. Those 75-percent-off boxes of chocolates aren't going to eat themselves.
All the damn love in the air is enough to make any reasonable girl reconsider the dude with the goofy smile and graphic tee who keeps popping up on Bumble. Maybe he's really nice to his mom?
That guy you dated a month ago is on the line, and he wants to know if you want to have an adult sleepover. Apparently some single dudes can't handle their solo status on Valentine's Day. New phone, who this?
JKJKJK—poor fashion sense is one thing, but emotional unavailability? Deal breaker.
As ballsy babe Jennifer Lawrence famously told a Vogue reporter in 2015, "Cheers to my hymen growing back!" If J. Law can be cool with it, you can be cool with it. Welcome back, old friend.
Yes V-Day is a cheesy holiday driven by consumerism, but it's also not going anywhere anytime soon, and while you don't have to participate in the most cliché of ways if that's not your jam, who couldn't use another reminder to be grateful for the love in your life (from your friends, your fam, your coworkers— #loveisloveislove)?